I believe it’s important to remind ourselves that… wherever we are meant to be, we will get there some day. Until then, we might as well make the process as enjoyable as possible. I noticed how crucial this was when life diverted from the ‘path’ that I had stubbornly worked out for myself. I noticed how I paid to go through this path with my wellbeing and, sometimes, my own happiness. I was blinded by the ambition reach the endpoint, without really knowing what it means. Because, at the end of the day, there is no endpoint.
We may set ourselves extrinsic goals as a form of motivation: go to that college. Earn that degree. Get that job. Whatever that is, you focus your energy and soul towards that path. But when you rely on these extrinsic goals, the danger is that it won’t always be so black and white. You might not get into that college. Or end up earning the degree you initially thought you would. Things won’t always go your way, and if you are crushed by this, then you were relying on the wrong goals.
I believe that we should organize our lives based on our intrinsic goals. What skills we want to have by such year/time. What things we want to learn this year. And then, we must ask ourselves why. Why I want to learn that language. Why do I want to travel to that country? Why should I earn that degree? The daunting part of this task is that we may start doubting ourselves and the choices we make. And that is also perfectly fine. It’s better to doubt yourself now, than ten years from now when you’re ‘stuck’ in that position.
“You’re under no obligation to be the same person you were 5 minutes ago” – Alan Watts
This is a quote that I live by. I’m someone who tends to hold on to things: to what I did in the past, to what I ‘was’. The fallacy in this belief is that I start looking at myself as a fixed person, rather than someone who evolves and changes over time. I really like this quote because it’s a reminder that we are free to be whoever we want at any point in our lives. Sure, we may have something holding us back – family, money, fear. But no one’s telling you to make the jump at once. With baby steps, you’ll make the progress towards the person that you wish to become. And then, you’ll be in a continual path towards doing things that truly give you that spark, instead of being grounded to what you believe is ‘right’.
I feel that I learned a lot about myself this year. I’m at a very uncertain point in my life in which I’m neither in school, college, or the workforce. Being in this position has made me question myself, over and over again, what kind of person I am. And what kind of person I want to be. Now, I know better what kind of person I am. Most importantly, though, I know that the person I am right now is susceptible to change at any point. And when that happens, I’ll be welcoming it with open arms. You should, too.